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Today, we had an invader in our chimney.  jak and Princess heard scrabbling in the chimney and, when I listened, I heard a strange peeping noise.  My assumption, however, that a bird had built a nest on the top of our chimney, was proven false when I heard the scrabbling against the damper.  When I went to open the damper, a blackbird flew out and straight for our sliding glass door.  I was able to open the door and let it out, but, for a while,  I’ll admit, I was a little scared.

In other news, I had to pull my ox from the mire today when I needed to go get some prescriptions filled.  I had to take boy along and he was still in his pajamas, so I put one of my short-sleeved button-up shirts onto him as a bathrobe.  Later, when I attempted to retrieve the shirt I didn’t realize at the time that, as is typical for him, Boy had decided that the shirt belonged to him.  So when I tried to take it back, he had a meltdown.  As usual, this ended with him in his room raging and with me in his room seated on the floor with my back to the door.  Boy has never liked being confined any place, so he fought me and I received a head-butt to the eye in his fury.  In shock and pain, I began to cry, knowing, somewhere in the back of my brain, that jak would come, like the wonderful rescuer he is, to protect me from my son. 

I know many of you will say that he should have stayed out of it, but I can’t agree with that.  I can’t help but remember the number of times my brothers and I managed to make my mother cry and how my father would make us sorry for it every time.  I have always wanted to be married to a man like that.   So, kudos to jak for being the kind of man who wants to protect his woman.

So, anyway, now I have a problem.  I can feel myself falling backward off the cliff into depression again.  It’s a journey I loathe to take because depression always seems to steal the joy from my life.  As a result, I am fighting it, tooth and nail.  I find myself singing snatches of favorite hymns and, although it’s Sunday, doing the minor housekeeping tasks that help keep our household running and usually give me such joy.  I still find myself wanting to cry from time to time, but I’m finding that the desire to lay down and do nothing or to disappear into a computer game, as I normally do when I get depressed, is diminishing.  It doesn’t go away completely, but it’s more like background noise.  I hope I’ll be able to say tomorrow that I have triumphed in the battle against depression.

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