SCOOBY4

 SCOOBY4

 When I was a kid, my understanding about the "Mystery Inc." gang, was that "Danger Prone" Daphne was Freddy's girl friend and brainy Velma was Shaggy's and that Scooby, of course, was Shaggy's dog.  It never occurred to me to consider how reality entered into things until I met and married my husband.  He often says things that make me laugh and he said a number of things about the Mystery Inc gang that, considering reality, is funny as anything else I've ever heard him say.  So, here, for your amusement, is a list that explains what may be one reality of Mystery Inc.

  • Freddy is the only straight one in the bunch, which is why he's the only one with his head in the game.  Since he's a normal, red blooded male, he splits the gang up and usually takes both the girls because he's hoping to score with one or both of them. 
  • Daphne is a rich, alcoholic socialite.  Toward the end of the series, she joins AA.
  • Velma is actually a lesbian.  She only dances with Shaggy because Daphne is usually already dancing with Freddy.  She's also like a female version of Encyclopedia Brown.
  • Shaggy is a dope fiend.  His drug of choice is marijuana, which explains why he's eating all the time.  He's also a sufferer of Marfan Syndrome, which explains his stature, the fact that he's so skinny, the size and slenderness of his hands and feet and that he speaks in such a nasally voice (all typical of Marfan's Syndrome).
  • As for Scooby, aside from being an abnormally intelligent and cowardly dog, Shaggy has only named him Scooby Doo to remind him to pay his dealer. Hence Scooby's famous cheer "Scooby Dooby Doo!"
  • Scooby Snacks are actually made by Shaggy.  They just keep the finished cookies in an old dog biscuits box in the Mystery Machine.  Incidentally, the recipe for Scooby Snacks involves marijuana.  This is why Shaggy sometimes wants some (his stash is usually low) and why Scooby is always hungry, too.  That also explains why Scooby Snacks make Scooby brave.
  • The Mystery Machine is owned by Freddy.  It was originally meant to be a make-out van.  The idea for the decorations came from Daphne and Shaggy, both of whom were high on their drug of choice.
  • The idea for creating Mystery Inc was Velma's, since she's the one who does most of the work involving solving the mysteries.

Looking at all this written down, I'm sorry to say that it doesn't look as funny as it sounds when jaklumen says it. Still, who knows? Maybe you'll find it funny. Then again, maybe you'll have other ideas that I can add into the list that would explain some of the weird things that the gang does.

 

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