This morning, I got up and was taking my shower, preparatory to getting my daughter up for school, and I happened to remember something my everlovin' hubby once said to someone I can't remember right at the moment. Anyway, they were talking about our financial situation and things of that nature and my husband said, "[Cimmy] is very proud. She really didn't want to sign up for financial assistance." At the time, I dismissed this comment. "I'm not proud," I thought, "After all, here we are on financial assistance."
This morning, though, the comment resurfaced in my brain and, rather than justify myself, I thought, "Am I proud?" After much thought, I've concluded that I am proud. There are certain things that I'd rather not do, unless I have to. Here's as much of a list as I can think up right at the moment.
- Get financial assistance (obviously)
- Have anyone help me do a job I've been asked to do.
- Have anyone take over a job I've been asked to do.
- Have people come over and criticize my cleaning skills (even if they're really poor).
- Be criticized at all.
- Go out and find a job outside the home (this is just a personal choice, okay?)
- Be treated disrespectfully by anyone younger than I am, even if they're not my kids.
- Receive a food donation from anyone I already know.
I guess that's about it. If I know Jaklumen, he may have a number of additions to make. That being the case, Jak, dear, please feel free.
Anyway, I know I'm proud, though I don't want to be. I suppose our current situation is the Lord's gentle way of helping me to see it. I wish such a thing were unnecessary, but, well, sometimes, I guess, stiff necked people like me need humbling. At least I didn't have to go through everything that Pharaoh went through with Moses.